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What I'm thinking about…
I have never really been the type of person to watch a movie more than once. Some people can watch the same movie 4-5 times with the same level of interest. For me, when I know what happens there is no intrigue and my ADHD brain wanders. Now I will admit that watching a movie is vastly different from real life but some similarities exist. For most of us, we want to know or have some certainty about the outcomes we experience in life. Consider a recent study in Nature Communications which showed humans hate the unknown so much that we’d rather experience punishment. This study had participants click on rocks on a screen. Once they chose a rock, it would flip over and reveal whether a virtual snake was hiding underneath. The participants received a painful electric shock if the rock hid a snake.
The main finding: The participants became most stressed when they were least able to predict whether a rock hid a snake. But the most interesting finding: When participants were more confident they would be painfully shocked, they were less stressed than when they felt like getting shocked was a coin flip. The unknown is more stressful than the known—even if the known involves punishment. If we can embrace the unknown and accept what happens we create less turbulence for ourselves. Ironically, most of the time our worries about what could happen never even transpire.
What I’m eating…
Wait for it…. Grilled cheese made in an air fryer. Crazy isn’t it? Crazy good that is. Grilled cheese is one of those comfort foods that reminds me of my childhood Saturday afternoons. A food that got me through university (before I became lactose intolerant), and allowed me to expand my culinary prowess and cooking skills as a teenager by adding caramelized onions to the standard recipe. When I came across the idea of making this Canadian staple in an air fryer, I was skeptical. But did it ever exceed my expectations? The benefits are both practical and a tasty end product including:
Let’s you make 2 full sandwiches in one go
Uniformly crispy bread
Cheese is uniformly melted
Let’s you use less butter/mayo saving you a few calories
The instructions are simple. Add a thin layer of mayo to the outside of the bread, use shredded cheese, insert toppings such as onions, thin slices of apple, or meat and air fry for 8 minutes (flipping at the 4-minute mark) at 360C. Voila, you are golden!
What new APP I’m trying out…
Struggling with an inbox of 1000 unread messages where the idea of ‘inbox zero’ is a distant dream? Last week I tried Meco, an application that helps organize subscription-based newsletters. Meco does 2 things for me. It gives me a dedicated place to find all my newsletters while decluttering my inbox! The process of deleting, unsubscribing, and moving to another folder is gone! When I want to dig in, I log in to Meco and it has my newsletters in one place. The best thing is it took only 3 minutes to set up. If you love reading and learning but don’t want to limit distractions, check it out here.
I have also reintroduced the concept of email batching. Now, my email stays closed on my computer. I have 2 designated times when I open and action emails. For me, this means going down fewer rabbit holes and staying on task longer.
Quote I’m resonating with…
The secret is to renounce nothing, cling to nothing, enjoy everything and allow it to pass, to flow.
Anthony de Mello
I recommended Anthony de Mello’s books Awareness in a previous post. Although the first few chapters can be a bit challenging to get through, the book has a valuable message and I would highly recommend reading it. Getting back to this quote - the renouncing part I don’t necessarily agree with. I think renouncing things that you know are bad for you will help you physically, mentally and emotionally. But I think the point the author is making is more from the mind’s perspective. When you renounce it is common for judgement to creep its head into the situation. When we renounce something we may label it as bad, but the truth is things are not bad or good - they just are and it is our thinking that makes them so. Clinging to material items, thoughts or expected outcomes ultimately leads to suffering. Yes, there is that ‘S’ word again. When we let go of attachment, we let go of control. Think about this for a moment and see the power that relinquishing control can have. I find this particularly beneficial for me when dealing with my kids. I used to get frustrated when they didn’t listen to me, but now I am much better at taking a breath, regulating myself and then finding a different, more playful way to have them do what needs to be done. The breath is key in helping us stay regulated. Finally, the last part of the quote is also related to attachment. It is useful to experience the good things in life without lamenting when they are gone. This way you get net joy from the experience. Understanding and most importantly remembering that everything is transient is the key to cultivating peace of mind.
Action Items
The next time you find yourself in a state of mental or physical suffering, remind yourself ‘This too shall pass’. To remember this thought in those moments, we need to remind ourselves of it regularly so this way of thinking becomes automatic.
Make yourself a grilled cheese sandwich in an air fryer. See the detailed recipe here.
The next time you find yourself worrying about the future, remind yourself how many pointless worry episodes you have had in the past that never came through. This can help ease your tension and center you in the present moment.
Registration is still open for the upcoming Rx for Renewal Winter Retreat on February 25th. Check out the event page and register here.